For every problem, there is a solution that is simple, elegant, and wrong.

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More from H. L. Mencken

Every election is a sort of advance auction sale of stolen goods.

Prejudices, First Series (1919)

Thanksgiving Day-A day devoted by persons with inflammatory rheumatism to thanking a loving Father that it is not hydrophobia.

A Mencken Chrestomathy, ch. 30, p. 618, Knopf (1949)

Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.

Attributed

Creator — A comedian whose audience is afraid to laugh.

A Book of Burlesques‎ (1920)

The theory seems to be that as long as a man is a failure he is one of God’s children, but that as soon as he succeeds he is taken over by the devil.