There is a tragic flaw in our precious constitution, and I don’t know what can be done to fix it. This is it: Only nutcases want to be president. This was true even in high school. Only clearly disturbed people ran for class president.

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More from Kurt Vonnegut

When Hemingway killed himself he put a period at the end of his life; old age is more like a semicolon.

The Associated Press, 2005.

I think that novels that leave out technology misrepresent life as badly as Victorians misrepresented life by leaving out sex.

A Man Without A Country

Life is no way to treat an animal, not even a mouse.

A Man Without A Country

We are here on Earth to fart around. Don’t let anybody tell you any different.

Do you realize that all great literature — Moby Dick, Huckleberry Finn, A Farewell to Arms, The Scarlet Letter, The Red Badge of Courage, The Iliad and The Odyssey, Crime and Punishment, The Bible and “The Charge of the Light Brigade” — are all about what a bummer it is to be a human being? (Isn’t it such a relief to have somebody say that?)