Mr. Stratford: I want you to wear the belly.
Bianca: Daddy, no!
Mr. Stratford: Not all night, just around the living room for a minute so you can understand the full weight of your decisions.
Bianca: I am perfectly aware-
Mr. Statford: Listen to me, every time you even think about kissing a boy, picture yourself wearing this under your halter top.

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Michael: Put her in your spank bank and move on.

Mr. Stratford: Where’s your sister going?
Kat: She’s meeting some bikers, big ones, full of sperm.

Michael: I have a question before we start. Do you think that’s safe considering you don’t have a liver?
Patrick: Huh?
Micheal: Never mind.

Joey: OK, now this is really important. Which do you like better?
Bianca: Um…I think I like the white shirt better.
Joey: Ya, It’s more uh…
Bianca: Pensive?
Joey: Damn, I was going for thoughtful.

Patrick: Don’t let anyone ever make you feel like you don’t deserve what you want.