Colonel Mustard: This is war, Peacock! Casualties are inevitable. You can’t make an omelette without breaking eggs, every cook will tell you that!
Mrs. Peacock: But look what happened to the cook!

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Mrs. White: Flies are where men are most vulnerable!

Colonel Mustard: Do you like Kipling, Miss Scarlet?
Miss Scarlet: Sure, I’ll eat anything.

Colonel Mustard: Are you trying to make me look stupid in front of the other guests?
Wadsworth: You don’t need any help from me, sir.
Colonel Mustard: That’s right!

Mrs. White: He threatened to kill me in public.
Miss Scarlet: Why would he want to kill you in public?
Wadsworth: I think she meant he threatened, in public, to kill her.
Miss Scarlet: Oh.

Mrs. White: Husbands should be like Kleenex. Soft, strong, and disposable.