Mr. Hall: Could all conversation please come to a halt? And could the the suicide attempts wait until next period?

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Cher: This is a second notice for outstanding parking tickets. I don’t remember getting a first notice.
Mel: The ticket is the first notice!

Josh: You know, if I ever saw you do something that wasn’t ninety percent selfish, I’d die of shock.
Cher: Oh, that’d be reason enough for me.

Cher: I had an overwhelming sense of ickiness.

Tai: What am I listening to you for anyway? You’re a virgin who can’t drive.

Cher: It’s like that book I read in the 9th grade that said “’tis a far far better thing doing stuff for other people.”