Store manager: Just how obscene an amount of cash are we talking about here? Profane or really offensive?
Edward: Really offensive.
Store manager: I like him so much.

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Vivian: I was in here yesterday. You wouldn’t wait on me. You work on commission right? Big mistake. Big. Huge! I have to go shopping now.

Stucky: Edward, Excuse me for saying this, but what the hell is wrong with you this week?

Vivian: Did I mention that my leg is 44 inches from hip to toe, so basically we’re talking about 88 inches of therapy wrapped around you for the bargain price of three thousand dollars.

Vivian: Well I’m not trying to land him, I’m just using him for sex.

Vivian: You can freeze ice on his wife’s ass.