Rain Man

Quotations

Raymond: It’s definitely very small in here.
Charlie: Small, and safe. Don’t wanna miss the party. You know that, there’s a party in your honor Ray. When we get to LA, there’ll be a little custody hearing. Lawyers are setting it up right now. Know why there’s a party for you? Because you’re the $3,000,000 man.

Raymond: Maple syrup is supposed to be on the table before the pancakes.
Charlie: Ray.
Raymond: Yeah?
Charlie: Ta da.
Raymond: Ha ha. Charlie Babbitt made a joke.

Charlie: Now casinos have house rules: they don’t like to lose. So you never show that you’re counting cards. That is the cardinal sin, Ray.
Raymond: Counting cards is bad.
Charlie: Yes.
Raymond: I like to drive slow on the driveway.
Charlie: If you get this right, Ray, you can drive anywhere you want as slow as you want.

Charlie: I’m sorry ma’am, I lied to you. I’m very sorry about that. That man right there is my brother and if he doesn’t get to watch ‘People’s Court’ in about 30 seconds, he’s gonna throw a fit right here on your porch. Now you can help me or you can stand there and watch it happen.

Charlie: Hey, Ray, you take a shower right?
Raymond: Yeah.
Charlie: Well the rain is a lot like the shower, you get a little wet. What do you say, Ray? What do you say?
Raymond: Of course the shower is in the bathroom.
Charlie: That’s the end of that conversation.

Raymond: Very shiny train.
Charlie: Yeah, sure is.

Doctor: Raymond, do you know what autistic is?
Raymond: Yeah.
Doctor: You know that word?
Raymond: Yeah.
Doctor: Are you autistic?
Raymond: I don’t think so. No. Definitely not.

Raymond: We have pepperoni pizza for dinner Monday nights.
Susanna: Pizza? You get pizza in an institution?
Raymond: Monday night is Italian night.

Charlie: When I was a little kid and I got scared, the Rain Man would come and sing to me.
Susanna: Rain what?
Charlie: Oh you know, one of those imaginary childhood friends.
Susanna: What happened to him?
Charlie: Nothing, I just grew up.
Susanna: Not so much.

Raymond: Of course I don’t have my underwear. I’m definitely not wearing my underwear.
Charlie: I gave you a fresh pair of mine to wear. Where are they?
Raymond: They’re in the pocket of my jacket. Here.
Charlie: I don’t want them back.
Raymond: These are not boxer shorts. Mine are boxer shorts. These are Hanes 32.
Charlie: Underwear is underwear, Ray.
Raymond: My boxer shorts have my name and it says Raymond.
Charlie: All right, when we pass the store, we’ll pick you up a pair of boxer shorts.
Raymond: I get my boxer shorts at K-Mart in Cincinatti.
Charlie: We’re not going back to Cincinatti, Ray, so don’t even start with that.

Raymond: C-H-A-R-L-I-E, my main man.

Charlie: I’m going to see you in 2 weeks. Now how many days is that before we’ll be together?
Raymond: 14 days from today, today’s Wednesday.
Charlie: Hours?
Raymond: 336 hours.
Charlie: Mystifying.
Raymond: Course that’s 20,160 minutes. 1,290,600 seconds.

Charlie: Raymond, what are you looking at? The ducks are over here. What are you looking at?
Raymond: I don’t know.

Doctor: Ray, do you want to stay and live with Charlie?
Raymond: Yeah.
Doctor: Or do you want to go back to Walbrook?
Raymond: Yeah.
Doctor: Which is it? Go back to Walbrook or stay with Charlie Babbitt?
Raymond: Go back to Walbrook, stay with Charlie Babbitt.

Raymond: Lights out at eleven.
Charlie: Yeah, well, new rules.

Doctor: Ray, do you know how much a candy bar costs?
Raymond: ‘Bout a hundred dollars.
Doctor: Do you know how much one of those new compact cars costs?
Raymond: ‘Bout a hundred dollars.

Charlie: Listen, Ray, our dad died, that means he’s not with us anymore. Did they tell you about that?
Raymond: I don’t know.
Charlie: You don’t know if they told you or you don’t know what death is?
Raymond: I don’t know.

Charlie: Okay, Ray, we’ve got blueberry, buckwheat, all flavors, what kind do you want?
Raymond: Pancakes.
Charlie: I know, but what kind?
Raymond: Pancakes.

Charlie: Ray, all airlines have crashed at one time or another, that doesn’t mean that they are not safe.
Raymond: QANTAS. QANTAS never crashed.
Charlie: QANTAS?
Raymond: Never crashed.
Charlie: Oh, that’s gonna do me a lot of good, because QANTAS doesn’t fly to Los Angeles out of Cincinnati. You have to get to Melbourne! Melbourne, Australia in order to get the plane that flies to Los Angeles!

Charlie: Ray, you’re never gonna solve it. It’s not a riddle because Who is on first base. That’s a joke, Ray, it’s comedy, but when you do it you’re not funny. You’re like the comedy of Abbott and Abbott.

Raymond: I’m an excellent driver.
Charlie: When did you drive?
Raymond: I drove slow on the driveway when my dad came to Walbrook.
Charlie: Was Dad in the car?
Raymond: Yeah.
Charlie: I’ll have to let you drive sometime.

Charlie: That’s amazing. He should work for NASA or something like that.
Doctor: Ray, if you had a dollar and you spent fifty cents, how much would you have left over?
Raymond: About seventy.
Doctor: Seventy cents?
Raymond: Seventy cents.
Charlie: So much for the NASA idea.
Raymond: K-Mart, we should go to K-Mart. 400 Oak Street.
Charlie: What did I tell you? After this!

Charlie: Who took this picture?
Raymond: D-A-D.
Charlie: And you lived with us?
Raymond: Yeah, 10962 Beachcrest Street, Cincinnatti, Ohio.
Charlie: When did you leave?
Raymond: January 12, 1965. Very snowy that day. 7.2 inches of snow that day.
Charlie: Just after Mom died.
Raymond: Yeah Mom died January 5, 1965.
Charlie: You remember that day. Was I there? Where was I?
Raymond: You were in the window. You waved to me, “Bye bye Rain Man”, “Bye bye.”

Raymond: Are you taking any prescription medication?
Vern: He likes you, that’s just his way of showing it.
Susanna: When I touched him, he pulled away.
Vern: Don’t take it personal. He never touched me and I’m closer to him than anyone in the world, known him for nine years. It’s not in him. If I left tomorrow without saying goodbye, he probably wouldn’t notice.
Susanna: He wouldn’t notice if you left?
Vern: I’m not sure but I don’t think people are his first priority.

Charlie: I’m gonna let ya’ in on a little secret, Ray. K-Mart sucks.