Jayne: I’ll kill a man in a fair fight, or if I think he’s gonna start a fair fight… If he bothers me, or if there’s a woman… Or if I’m gettin’ paid. Mostly only when I’m gettin’ paid.
Mal: I’m gonna show you a world without sin.
The Operative: You know, in certain older civilized cultures, when men failed as entirely as you have, they would throw themselves on their swords.
Dr. Mathias: Well, unfortunately, I forgot to bring a sword.
Kaylee: We’re on a year now, I ain’t had nothing ‘twixt my nethers weren’t run on batteries.
Mal: Oh, God! I can’t know that!
Jayne: I could stand to hear a little more.
Mal: Think she’ll hold together?
Zoe: She’s tore up plenty, but she’ll fly true.
The Operative: Would you be killed in your sleep, like an ailing pet?
Mal: I believe you got some storytelling to do. What in the hell happened back there?
Wash: Start with the part where Jayne gets knocked out by a 90-pound girl, ’cause I don’t think that’s ever getting old.
Mal: It ain’t all buttons and charts, little albatross. You know what the first rule of flyin’ is? Well, I suppose you do, since you already know what I’m about to say.
River: I do. But I like to hear you say it.
Mal: Love. You can know all the math in the ‘verse, but you take a boat in the air you don’t love, she’ll shake you off just as sure as the turning of worlds. Love keeps her in the air when she oughtta fall down… tells ya she’s hurtin’ ‘fore she keens… makes her a home.
River: Storm’s getting worse.
Mal: We’ll pass through it soon enough.
Mal: What was that?
Wash: Did you see that?
Mal: Was that the primary buffer panel?
Wash: It did seem to resemble…
Mal: Did the primary buffer panel just fall off my gorram ship for no apparent reason?
Mr. Universe: You can’t stop the signal, Mal.
Book: I don’t care what you believe in, just believe in it.
Mal: I thought Kaylee just checked the entry couplings. I have a very clear memory of it!
Wash: Yeah well, if she doesn’t give us some extra flow from the engine room to offset the burn-through, this landing is going to get pretty interesting.
Mal: Define interesting!
Wash: “Oh god, oh god, we’re all gonna die”?
Book: You got a plan?
Mal: Hiding ain’t a plan?
Mal: This is the captain, we have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight turbulence, and then… explode.
Book: It’s not your way, Mal.
Mal: I have a way? That better than a plan?
Mal: Just get us on the ground!
Wash: That part will happen pretty definitely.
Mal: Zoe, the ship is yours. Remember, if anything happens to me; if you don’t hear from me within the hour; you take this ship and you come and you rescue me!
Zoe: What? And risk my ship?
Mal: I mean it. It’s cold out there, and I don’t want to get left.
Jayne: We’re gonna explode? I don’t wanna explode!
The Operative: I have to say, Captain, I’m impressed that you would come for her yourself. And that you would make it this far, in that outfit.
Mal: I can be very graceful when I need to.
The Operative: I’ve no doubt.
Mal: I don’t plan on any shooting taking place during this job.
Jayne: Yeah, well what you plan and what takes place ain’t ever exactly been similar.
The Operative: That girl will rain destruction down on you and your ship. She is an albatross, Captain.
Mal: The way I remember it, albatross was a ship’s good luck, ’til some idiot killed it. Yes, I’ve read a poem. Try not to faint.
Zoe: Those grenades?
Jayne: Yeah, Captain doesn’t want them.
Zoe: Jayne, we’re robbing the place. We’re not occupying it.
Mal: I never credited the Alliance with an overabundance of brains, and if you’re the best they’ve got.
The Operative: Captain Reynolds, I should tell you so you don’t waste your time: you cannot make me angry.
Inara: Please, spend an hour with him.
Zoe: We crashing again?
Mal: Do you want to run this ship?
Mal: Well…you can’t!