Shrek: Ogres are like onions.
Donkey: They stink?
Shrek: Yes. No.
Donkey: Oh, they make you cry.
Shrek: No.
Donkey: Oh, you leave em out in the sun, they get all brown, start sproutin’ little white hairs.
Shrek: No. Layers. Onions have layers. Ogres have layers. Onions have layers. You get it? We both have layers.
Donkey: Oh, you both have layers. Oh. You know, not everybody like onions.

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Lord Farquaad: Some of you may die, but that is a sacrifice I am willing to make.

Donkey: Blue flower, red thorns, blue flower, red thorns – this would be so much easier if I wasn’t color blind!

Donkey: I’ll find those stairs. I’ll whip their butt, too. Those stairs won’t know which way they’re going.

Shrek: That’ll do, Donkey. That’ll do.

Donkey: So where is this fire-breathin’ pain in the neck, anyway?
Shrek: In the tower, waiting for us to rescue her.
Donkey: I was talkin’ about the dragon, Shrek.