Geek: Can I borrow your underpants for ten minutes?
Geek: I mean you don’t have to dance. You can just stand there, hang with my dudes and be you…
Samantha: Sounds major.
Geek: So, you got a guy?
Samantha: Yes, three big ones and they lust wimp blood. So stop bugging me or I’ll sick them all over your weenie ass.
Grandpa: Dong? Where is my automobile?
Long Duck Dong (mockingly): Auto-mo-bile? (makes car crash noises)
Long Duck Dong: No more yanky my wanky – the Donger need food!
Long Duck Dong: What’s happening, hot stuff?
Ginny: Darling, is something bothering you? You’re really acting like…an asshole.
Samantha: Well, when you don’t have anything, you don’t have anything to lose right?
Samantha: I loathe the bus.
Long Duk Dong: Awwwwww…sexy girlfriend!
Ginny: I mean, I’ve had men that have loved me before, but not for 6 months in a row.