Lurlynn: You know he went up there?
Melanie Carmichael: Who? Jake?
Lurlynn: I’m not supposed to know but Clinton let it slip once.
Melanie Carmichael: When?
Lurlynn: About a year after you left. He told Clinton he’d never seen anything like it. He knew that it would take more than an apology to get you back. He’d have to conquer the world first. He’s been trying ever since.
Melanie Carmichael: That’s why he kept sending the papers back.

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Melanie Carmichael: You’re the first boy I ever kissed, Jake, and I want you to be the last.

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Melanie Carmichael: Oh why don’t you just go to a gay bar, Bobby Ray?
Clinton: Now, what would Bobby Ray be doing in a gay bar?

Jake: Whatever blows your dress up, darlin’. You go right ahead and spend your money.
Melanie Carmichael: Oh, but darlin’, I thought you said we should think of it as “our money.” Just a guess: The words “joint checking” are flashing in your head right now.