Bobby Ray: You can take the girl out of the honky tonk, but you can’t take the honky tonk out of the girl.
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Jake: Honey, just cuz I talk slow doesn’t mean I’m stupid.
Lurlynn: You know he went up there?
Melanie Carmichael: Who? Jake?
Lurlynn: I’m not supposed to know but Clinton let it slip once.
Melanie Carmichael: When?
Lurlynn: About a year after you left. He told Clinton he’d never seen anything like it. He knew that it would take more than an apology to get you back. He’d have to conquer the world first. He’s been trying ever since.
Melanie Carmichael: That’s why he kept sending the papers back.
Bobby Ray: What’d I ever do to you?
Melanie Carmichael: Oh, you didn’t do anything to me, darlin’… or any other girl in town!
Jake: How can I help you?
Melanie: Well, for starters you can get your stubborn ass down here and give me a divorce!
Mayor Kate Hennings: Why don’t you go back to your double-wide and fry something?