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More from Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby

Jean Girard: My husband Gregory and I want what any couple wants. To retire to Stockholm and develop a currency for dogs and cats to use.

Cal Naughton, Jr.: I like to think of Jesus as an Ice Dancer, dressed in an all-white jumpsuit, and doing an interpretive dance of my life.

Cal Naughton, Jr.: I like to picture Jesus in a tuxedo T-Shirt because it says I want to be formal, but I’m here to party.

Ricky Bobby: I’m just a big hairy American winning machine, you know?

PA Announcer: Girard is sitting on the pole, which is a statement of fact and in no way a comment on his sexual orientation.