Oscar Madison: Don’t threaten me with jail, Blanche, because it’s not a threat. With my expenses and my alimony, a prisoner takes home more pay than I do.
captivating quotations from movies, television, literature and people - curated by actual geeks.
Oscar Madison: Don’t point that finger at me unless you intend to use it.
Oscar Madison: I’m in for a quarter.
Murray: Aren’t you going to look at your cards first?
Oscar Madison: What for? I’m gonna bluff anyway.
Oscar Madison: Life goes on, even for those of us who are divorced, broke, and sloppy.
Oscar Madison: Murray, lend me twenty dollars or I’ll call your wife and tell her you’re in Central Park wearing a dress.
Felix Ungar: I’m a neurotic nut, but you’re crazy!