Dug: I know a joke! A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, “I forgot to store acorns for the winter and now I am dead.” It’s funny because the squirrel gets dead!

tagged: animals, dogs, jokes

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Russell: Speak.
Dug: Hi there!
Carl: Did that dog just say “Hi there”?
Dug: Oh yes!

Carl: Let’s play “Who Can Be Quiet The Longest.”
Russell: Cool! My mom loves that game!

Russell: Hi, Mr. Fredricksen! It’s me, Russell.
Carl: What’re you doing up here, kid?
Russell: I found the snipe, and I followed it under your porch, but this snipe had a long tail and looked more like a large mouse.

Russell: Are you in need of any assistance today, sir?
Carl: No.
Russell: I could help you cross the street.
Carl: No.
Russell: I could help you cross your yard.
Carl: No.
Russell: I could help you cross your porch.
Carl: No.
Russel: Well, I gotta help you cross something.
Carl: Uh… no I’m doing fine.

Dug: My master made me this collar. He is a good and smart master and he made me this collar so that I may talk – SQUIRREL! My master is good and smart.