Garth: Benjamin is nobody’s friend. If Benjamin were an ice cream flavor, he’d be pralines and dick.
captivating quotations from movies, television, literature and people - curated by actual geeks.
Wayne: Am I supposed to just turn my back and leave, am I supposed to be a man? Am I supposed say, it’s okay, I don’t mind, I don’t mind? Well I mind, I mind big time! And you know what the worst part of it all is? I never learned to read!
Cassandra: Is that true?
Wayne: Yes, everything except the reading part.
Garth: “Who’s trying to kill you, Mr. Donut-head Man?” “I don’t know, but he better not.”
Wayne Campbell: Garth, marriage is punishment for shoplifting in some countries!
Wayne Campbell: All I have to say about that is “asphinctersayswhat”.
Arcade owner: What?
Wayne Campbell: Exactly.
Wayne Campbell: I say puke. If you hurl and she comes back, she’s yours. If you blow chunks and she bolts, then it was never meant to be.