Buffy: So what I’m wondering is: does this always happen? Sleep with a guy and he goes all evil?

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Jack: What are you, retarded?
Xander: No. No, I had to take that test when I was seven. A little slow in some stuff, mostly math and spatial relations, but certainly not challenged or anything.

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Xander: Ooh, gang, didja hear that? A bonus day of class plus Cordelia! Mix in a little rectal surgery and it’s my best day ever!

Xander: Who’s the little fear demon? Come on, who’s the little fear demon?
Giles: Don’t taunt the fear demon.
Xander: Why? Can he hurt me?
Giles: No, it’s just…tacky.

Giles: Yes, always behind on terms. I’m still trying not to refer to you lot as ‘bloody colonials.’

Spike: This is the crack team that foils my every plan? I am deeply shamed.

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