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More from Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Xander: I cannot stress enough how much I don’t have plans.

Josh: Halloween isn’t about thrills, chills, and funny costumes; it’s about getting laid.
Edward: Is there any holiday that’s not about getting laid?
Josh: Arbor Day.

Jack: What are you, retarded?
Xander: No. No, I had to take that test when I was seven. A little slow in some stuff, mostly math and spatial relations, but certainly not challenged or anything.

The Zeppo

Xander: Ooh, gang, didja hear that? A bonus day of class plus Cordelia! Mix in a little rectal surgery and it’s my best day ever!

Buffy: Conjuring? Will, let’s be realistic here, okay? Your basic spells are usually only about 50-50.
Willow: Oh yeah? Well…so’s your face.
Buffy: What?