Willow: That’s me as a vampire? I’m so evil, and skanky… and I think I’m kinda gay.
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Giles: I’m not supposed to have a private life?
Buffy: No. Because you’re very, very old and it’s gross.
viewXander: For I am Xander, Kind of Cretins, may all lesser Cretins bow before me.
The Witch
Anya: You don’t need me. All you care about is lots of orgasms.
Xander: Okay, remember how we talked about private conversations? How they’re less private when they’re in front of my friends?
Spike: Oh, we’re not your friends; go on.
Spike: Sometimes I like to crumble the Weetabix in the blood. Gives it a little texture.
Giles: Since the picture you just painted means that I will never touch food of any kind again, you’ll just have to pick it up yourself.
Spike: Sissy.
Xander: Well, not much goes on in a one-Starbucks town like Sunnydale.
