Giles (regarding Buffy and Angel’s break-up): I understand this sort of thing requires ice cream of some kind.

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Willow: If you hurt her, I will beat you to death with a shovel. A vague disclaimer is nobody’s friend. Have fun!

Giles: We can’t let you go until we’re sure that you’re impotent or –
Spike: Hey!
Giles: Sorry, poor choice of words. Until we know that you’re…
Buffy: Flaccid?
Spike: You are one step away, missy!
Buffy: Giles help! He’s gonna scold me!

Buffy: What are you doing here?
Angel: It’s a dangerous time you know, with faith.
Buffy: Yeah Faith, she well, Faith what can you say about her.
Angel: I just wanted to make sure that you’re, you know, ok, that you’re safe.
Buffy: Well the fact that you’re right here, does this mean that Faith is around? Are you keeping me safe by tracking me or are you tracking her?
Angel: I’m tracking you.

Willow: When I’m with a boy I like I can’t say anything cool, or witty–or at all. I can usually make a few vowel sounds, and then I have to go away.

Giles: I can’t believe you served Buffy that beer.
Xander: I didn’t know it was evil.
Giles: You knew it was beer.
Xander: Well, excuse me, Mr. ‘I spent the sixties in an electric-kool-aid-funky-Satan groove.’
Giles: It was the early seventies and you should know better.