Wash: What happened to Simon? Who is this diabolical master of disguise?

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Wash: I wish I was somebody else right now, somebody not… married, not madly in love with a beautiful woman who can kill me with her pinky.

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Jayne: Far as I see it, you people been given the shortest end of the stick ever been offered a human soul in this crap-hill ‘verse. But you took that end, and you… Well, you took it. And that’s – Well, I guess that’s somethin’.

Inara: So, do aliens live among us?
Kaylee: Yeah. One of them’s a doctor.

Zoe: First rule of battle, little one… don’t ever let them know where you are.
Mal: WHOO-HOO! I’M RIGHT HERE! I’M RIGHT HERE! YOU WANT SOME O’ ME?! YEAH YOU DO! COME ON! COME ON! AAAAAH! Whoo-hoo!
Zoe: Course, there’re other schools of thought.

Mal: Been a long time since Patience shot me, and that was due to a perfectly legitimate conflict of interest. I got no grudge.

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