Firefly

Quotations

Jayne: Any one you walk away from, right? Long as we got the goods, I call this a win.
Mal: Right. We win.

Pilot

Jayne: Testing. Testing, Captain, can you hear me?
Mal: I’m standing right here.
Jayne: You’re coming through good and loud.
Mal: ‘Cause I’m standing right here.

Mal: Whatever happens, remember I love you.
Zoe: Sir?
Mal: Because you’re my wife.
Zoe: Right, sir. Honey.

The Train Job

Mal: My work’s illegal, but at least it’s honest.

Jayne: This place gives me an uncomfortableness.

Saffron: I do know my Bible, sir. “On the night of their betrothal, the wife shall open to the man as the furrow to the plow, and he shall work in her, in and again, till she bring him to his full, and rest him then upon the sweat of her breast.”
Mal: Whoa. Good Bible.

River: They say the snow on the roof is too heavy. They say the ceiling will cave in. His brains are in terrible danger.

On seeing Book's copius amount of hair for the first time.

Captain: You woulda done the same.
Mal: We can already see I haven’t.

Jayne: Smellin’ a lot of “if” comin’ off this plan.

Badger: Crime and politics, little girl. Situation is always fluid.
Jayne: The only fluid I see here is the puddle of piss refusing to pay us our wage.

Pilot

Mal: Well, you were right about this being a bad idea.
Zoe: Thanks for saying, sir.

Serenity

Mal: Well, didn’t I see an entire regiment of fine, young Alliance federals on the train?
Sheriff: You did. Same regiment let our medicine get swiped right out from under their noses then took off for their own camp without so much as a whoopsy-daisy.

Mal: And I never back down from a fight.
Inara: Yes, you do. You do all the time.

Shindig

River: I get confused. I remember everything. I remember too much. And… some of it’s made up, and… some of it can’t be quantified, and… there’s secrets, and …
Simon: It’s okay.
River: But I understand. You gave up everything you had to find me. You found me broken. It’s hard for you. You gave up everything you had.
Simon: Mei-mei. Everything I have is right here.

Saffron: Leave me at the nearest port. Never look upon me again. I’ll make my way with the strength that you’ve taught me. Only let me have my wedding night.
Mal: Oh, I’m gonna go to the special hell.

Mal: So, that’s where the little “Jayne Day Celebration” we got planned comes in. Should give us enough time to get the goods back onto Serenity.
Jayne: I don’t know. You think we should be using my fame to hoodwink folks?
Mal: You better laugh when you say that.
Jayne: No really, Mal, I mean, maybe there’s something to this. The Mudders? I think I really made a difference in their lives. You know — me, Jayne Cobb.
Mal: I know your name, jackass!