Monica: Do you really think the best reason to get married is becuase you’re sorry?
Chandler: Oh, no. The best reason to get married is pregnancy.

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Joey: Ross, if homo sapiens actually were HOMO sapiens, is that why they’re extinct?
Ross: Joey, homo sapiens are people!
Joey: Hey, I’m not judging!

Ross: I was having a little chat with ah, Bonnie, and ah, guess what, she-she happened to bring up y’know, who was behind the um, whole head shaving idea, and now, who was it? Oh, that’s right, that’s right, it was you!
Rachel: That was her idea, I just gave her a nudge.
Ross: She said you gave her the razor!

Phoebe: See, he’s her lobster!

Chandler: Well, my apartment’s not there anymore because I drank it.

Chandler: Ok, lets focus something else. Beautiful eyes, nice nose, great smile, BIG HEAD BIG HEAD BIG HEAD!!!