Jimmy: You poor misguided Canadian bastard.
captivating quotations from movies, television, literature and people - curated by actual geeks.
Bill: You know what it’s like? It’s like taking your daughter to the fair and buying her cotton candy and winning prizes for her and then you get on the Ferris wheel and she wants to make out.
Bill: Well how could she do that to me, Lisa? How could she… french her daddy?
Bill: In the future, it might help if you located the source of your rage before you unleashed it on the world.
Dave Nelson: Look, it’s only a birthday present! It just means I’m glad you didn’t die partway through the year.
Jimmy: James James, the man so nice they named him twice.
Lisa: What about that sweet 18-year-old kid in accounting who had that crush on you?
Dave: Oh, that was completely different.
Dave: Well, for one thing, he was a guy. And he thought I was gay. And he brought his mother to work and introduced me as his boss-slash-husband.
Lisa: Well, it was still flattering, wasn’t it?
Dave: Oh, lord yes.