Michael Kelso: Guess who made out with Pam Macey behind the gym!
Steven Hyde: Anyone with a quarter?
Michael Kelso: Me!
Fez: Damn, and I had a quarter!

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More from That 70's Show

Michael Kelso: I miss Eric.
Jackie Burkhardt: Well, you still have me.
Michael Kelso: It’s not the same, Jackie. I can talk to Eric about things that I can’t talk about with you.
Jackie Burkhardt: Okay, well like what?
Michael Kelso: Well, for instance, the annoying things you do.
Jackie Burkhardt: Michael.
Michael Kelso: See, I can’t talk to you.

Red: Let me get this straight – Donna told you she wanted to get back together and you said no?
Eric: I said no.
Red: What the Hell is wrong with you?
Kitty Forman: Dumbass!

Michael Kelso: If this van’s a-rockin’… we’re in there doing it.

Donna Pinciotti: Why does your dad want to ruin my dad’s barbecue?
Eric: Well, my dad thinks that if your dad’s barbecue is better than his, the Russkies are gonna take over the planet.

Red Forman: Forman, party of two.
Restaurant Hostess: Okey dokey, that’ll be about two hours.
Red Forman: Here’s twenty bucks.
Restaurant Hostess: Okay we’ll have something in fifteen minutes.
Red Forman: You don’t want this place to burn down twice do you?
Restaurant Hostess: Okay we have something right now.
Red Forman: I thought so. Well, it looks like it’s our lucky night.