Michael Kelso: Ooooh! Burn! That’s a burn about a burn! That’s a 2nd degree burn!

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More from That 70's Show

Kitty Forman: Have you ever baked a pie before?
Jackie Burkhardt: No, I don’t really cook much. I kinda was just hoping to get by on my looks.

Kitty Forman: I really doubt that she’s just abandoning Stephen, I mean, she’s his mother.
Eric: Mom, her exact words were “I know I’m your mother but I’m abandoning you.”

Eric: Bad things keep happening to me, like I have bad luck or something.
Red Forman: Son, you don’t have bad luck. The reason bad things happen to you is because you’re a dumbass.

Thanksgiving (season 1, episode 9)

Fez: These after-school specials are thrilling. Who knew that one beer could turn a cheerleader into a whore?

Kitty Forman: Red’s mother is coming.
Midge Pinciotti: What’s that pet name she has for you?
Kitty Forman: Whore.