Homer: Can I at least make you coffee Mr. Burns?
Burns: No! No thank you! Coffee’s already made! I stomped the beans myself! Hear that? The percolations are imminent!

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Mr. Burns: Homer, I want you to show this woman the time of her life.
Homer: Gotcha. Marge, we’re getting some drive-thru, then we’re doing it twice.

Homer: I love you, honey.
Marge: Are you talking to me or the beer?
Homer: To you my bubbly, longnecked, beechwood aged lover.

Groundskeeper Willie: Lunchlady Doris, have ye got any grease?
Lunchlady Doris: Yes, Yes we do.
Willie: Then grease me up woman.
Doris: Okey-Dokey.

The Stonecutter’s Song
Who controls the British Crown?
Who keeps the metric system down?
We do. We do.
Who keeps Atlantis off the maps?
Who keeps martians under wraps?
We do. We do.
Who holds back the electric car?
Who made Steve Guttenberg a STAR?
We do. We do.
Who robs cavefish of their sight?
Who riggs every Oscar night?
We do.
WE DO!

Marge: You aren’t even listening to me. You’re only hearing what you want to hear.
Homer: Thanks honey! I’d love a pork chop right about now!