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Homer: Well, honey, what do you like? Tuba-ma-ba? Oba-ma-bo? That one? Saxa-ma-phone?

Burns: He’s a madman! I must reach Smithers! Now, how does this telephone machine work? I’ve seen others use it, let’s see S-M-I-T-H-E-R-S. By jove it worked! It’s ringing!
Moe: Moe’s tavern.
Burns: I’d like to speak to a Mr. Smithers. First name, Waylen.
Moe: Ohhhh. First name “Waylen” hey? Listen, you, if I ever get my hands on you, I’m gonna shove sausages down your throat and hungry dogs up your butt. Then I’ll use your tounge to paint my boat!
Burns: Wahh!

Mr. Burns: Homer, I want you to show this woman the time of her life.
Homer: Gotcha. Marge, we’re getting some drive-thru, then we’re doing it twice.

Homer: I love you, honey.
Marge: Are you talking to me or the beer?
Homer: To you my bubbly, longnecked, beechwood aged lover.

Groundskeeper Willie: Lunchlady Doris, have ye got any grease?
Lunchlady Doris: Yes, Yes we do.
Willie: Then grease me up woman.
Doris: Okey-Dokey.