Homer: Apu, if it’ll make you feel any better, I’ve learned that life is one crushing defeat after another until you just wish Flanders was dead!

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Mo: You’re a pig. Barney’s a pig. Larry’s a pig. we’re all pigs… once in a while, we can crawl out of the slop, hose ourselves off, and act like human beings.

Homer: Homer no function beer well without.

Homer: Oh Lisa! You and your stories! Bart’s a vampire! Beer kills brain cells! Now let’s go back to that…building…thingie…where our beds and TV…is.

Comic Book Guy: Oh loneliness and cheeseburgers are a deadly combination.

Burn’s Messages read by Homer: “You have 30 minutes to move your car”, “You have 10 minutes”,”Your car has been impounded”, “Your car has been crushed into a cube”, “You have 30 minutes to move your cube”.