Categories
Wilson Mizner

Stop dying. Am trying to write a comedy.

Stop dying. Am trying to write a comedy.

Categories
Wilson Mizner

It’s getting so people no longer count the silverware when I come to dinner.

It’s getting so people no longer count the silverware when I come to dinner.

Categories
Wilson Mizner

…a trip through a sewer in a glass-bottom boat.

…a trip through a sewer in a glass-bottom boat.

Categories
Wilson Mizner

To my embarrassment I was born in bed with a lady.

To my embarrassment I was born in bed with a lady.

Categories
Wilson Mizner

Life’s a tough proposition, and the first hundred years are the hardest.

Life’s a tough proposition, and the first hundred years are the hardest.

Categories
Wilson Mizner

A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while he gets to know something.

A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while he gets to know something.

Categories
Wilson Mizner

Faith is a wonderful thing, but doubt gets you an education.

Faith is a wonderful thing, but doubt gets you an education.

Categories
Wilson Mizner

I’ve known countless people who were reservoirs of learning, yet never had a thought.

I’ve known countless people who were reservoirs of learning, yet never had a thought.

Categories
Wilson Mizner

If you copy from one author, it’s plagiarism. If you copy from two, it’s research.

If you copy from one author, it’s plagiarism. If you copy from two, it’s research.

Categories
Wilson Mizner

The gent who wakes up and finds himself a success hasn’t been asleep.

The gent who wakes up and finds himself a success hasn’t been asleep.

Categories
Wilson Mizner

I can usually judge a fellow by what he laughs at.

I can usually judge a fellow by what he laughs at.

Categories
Wilson Mizner

The worst tempered people I have ever met were those who knew that they were wrong.

The worst tempered people I have ever met were those who knew that they were wrong.

Categories
Wilson Mizner

Don’t talk about yourself; it will be done when you leave.

Don’t talk about yourself; it will be done when you leave.

Categories
Wilson Mizner

Be nice to people on your way up because you’ll meet them on your way down.

Be nice to people on your way up because you’ll meet them on your way down.