People
Weekends don't count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless.
— Bill Watterson
Behind the line May contain spoilers.
Our reading
An editorial interpretation.
The speaker makes uselessness a qualification for a successful weekend. The joke reverses the usual pressure to justify time through productive results: here, doing something pointless is exactly what makes leisure count. The absolute wording turns a preference for play into a mock rule.
Context reviewed