Apu, if it'll make you feel any better, I've learned that life is one crushing defeat after another until you just wish Flanders was dead!

More from Homer

• Among all creatures that breathe on earth and crawl on it there is not anywhere a thing more dismal than man is.
• And you, old sir, we are told you prospered once.
• After years of disappointment with get rich quick scheme, I know I'm gonna get rich with this scheme. And quick.
• Can't talk ... eating.
• Donuts ... is there anything they can't do?
• I am so smart. I am so smart. S-M-R-T, I mean S-M-A-R-T.