Neil Simon — People

Painterly melting ice cream cone beside a glass inkwell and scattered pale fragments. — Original artwork

How am I going to become a writer if I don't know how to suffer? Actually, I'd give up writing if I could see a naked girl while I was eating ice cream.

Neil Simon

Painterly small wooden writing desk with an open book, quill, pale flower and red wax seal. — Original artwork

She wants me to write quietly. If that was the only sentence I published in my memoirs, it would be a bestseller.

Neil Simon

Inside-out empty olive wallet beside folded blank pale mint sheets — Original artwork

Why don't you just say you lost the money? You had a hole in your pocket. You can tear a hole in your pocket.

Neil Simon

An olive-green rotary telephone sits beside a small white cotton cloud connected to its curled cord against lilac. — Original artwork

You don’t get too far talking to Laurie. Sometimes I think the flutter in her heart is really in her brain.

Neil Simon