Life is like a sewer. What you get out of it depends on what you put into it.

More from Tom Lehrer

• It is a sobering thought, for instance, that when Mozart was my age, he had been dead for two years.
• 24 beers in a case, 24 hours in a day, coincedence? I think not.
• A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain.
• Above all, do not fail to give good dinners, and to pay attention to the women.
• Abstinence is as easy to me as temperance would be difficult.
• Abstract Art: A product of the untalented, sold by the unprincipled to the utterly bewildered.