Golf is an ineffectual attempt to put an elusive ball into an obscure hole with implements ill-adapted to the purpose.

More from Woodrow Wilson

• I would never read a book if it were possible for me to talk half an hour with the man who wrote it.
• We are provincials no longer. The tragic events of the 30 months of vital turmoil through which we have just passed have made us citizens of the world. There can be no turning back.
• 24 beers in a case, 24 hours in a day, coincedence? I think not.
• A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain.
• Above all, do not fail to give good dinners, and to pay attention to the women.
• Abstinence is as easy to me as temperance would be difficult.