Rhoda Morgenstern — Characters

A lattice-crust apple pie on a pedestal plate with tiny stars scattered on a dark blue tablecloth. — Original artwork

I don’t know why I should even bother to eat this. I should just apply it directly to my hips.

Rhoda Morgenstern

Painterly round vanity mirror showing a moonlike surface beside a glowing wall light. — Original artwork

It’s a magnifying mirror! Mary, why didn’t you warn me? I thought it was a relief map of the moon. When they sell those magnifying mirrors they should include a printed suicide note.

Rhoda Morgenstern