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I especially want to apologize to the Trochman family in Detroit... I never delivered a baby before, and I just thought that ice tongs were the way to do it.

— Leonard Zelig  ·  Zelig

Metal ice tongs rest on folded white cloth beside a single egg in a small twig nest on pale blue ground.
Original artwork
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Our reading

An editorial interpretation.

The speaker apologizes for using ice tongs during a delivery and explains it through inexperience. The explanation is alarming precisely because it sounds so matter-of-fact. Read as absurd comedy, it exposes a gulf between confident improvisation and the knowledge needed for the task being described.

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