Lily Tomlin — People

A small paper kite caught on a twig with a spool of thread on the ground. — Original artwork

Don’t be afraid of missing opportunities. Behind every failure is an opportunity somebody wishes they had missed.

Lily Tomlin

A lime-and-blue striped hammock stretched between two small hurdles, one leaning over, against a white background. — Original artwork

For fast acting relief, try slowing down.

Lily Tomlin

An orange paper doll beside a wooden rack of empty picture frames and a tiny potted plant. — Original artwork

I always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific.

Lily Tomlin

Small empty slate chair facing a standing oval mirror — Original artwork

I always wondered why somebody doesn’t do something about that. Then I realized I was somebody.

Lily Tomlin

A tilted glass jar containing a golden question mark, resting on plum velvet. — Original artwork

If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?

Lily Tomlin

Painterly two mismatched cups on a small lace-covered round table, steam rising against coral. — Original artwork

I have always felt that humor was a wonderful vehicle to let us become connected with each other and ourselves… I try to portray the similarities and polarities in men and women, so that we can acknowledge and embrace our collective consciousness.

Lily Tomlin

A wooden gavel lies on a hand mirror surrounded by grey paper shapes. — Original artwork

It’s not whether God is on our side or whether we’re doing God’s will, it’s being so narcissistic as to think that God is telling you what to do.

Lily Tomlin

A yellow record leaning against a small turquoise speaker on a lilac floor. — Original artwork

I worry that the person who thought up Muzak may be thinking up something else.

Lily Tomlin

A small wooden crutch lies beside a large loose magenta ribbon against mint. — Original artwork

Reality is a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs.

Lily Tomlin

Drooping green leaf beside a single upright rust-colored thorn on woven cloth — Original artwork

Reality is the leading cause of stress among those in touch with it.

Lily Tomlin

A brass balance scale with a pile of gold coins outweighing a small white porcelain feather on a deep green background. — Original artwork

Truth is, I’ve always been selling out. The difference is that in the past, I looked like I had integrity because there were no buyers.

Lily Tomlin

An ornate hand mirror leans against a burgundy velvet cushion beside a pale quill feather. — Original artwork

When you talk about yourself for 35 years, first of all, it gets repetitious. And then it seems a little bit excessive, at the least.

Lily Tomlin

A small grey rat wearing a gold medal stands at the entrance to a cardboard maze against coral. — Original artwork

The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.

Lily Tomlin