More from Henny Youngman
- I bet on a horse at ten to one. It didn't come in until half-past five.
- If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.
- I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up — they have no holidays.
- I take my wife everywhere I go. She always finds her way back.
- I’ve got all the money I’ll ever need, if I die by four o clock.
- My dad was the town drunk. Usually that's not so bad, but New York City?
Last reviewed 2026-07-06