
I like to think of Jesus as a mischievous badger.
Cal Naughton, Jr.
I like to think of Jesus as a mischievous badger.

I like to think of Jesus as a mischievous badger.
Cal Naughton, Jr.

Hakuna Matata, bitches!
Jean Girard

My husband Gregory and I want what any couple wants. To retire to Stockholm and develop a currency for dogs and cats to use.
Jean Girard

Will you be my... Katie Couric?
Jean Girard

Girard is sitting on the pole, which is a statement of fact and in no way a comment on his sexual orientation.
PA Announcer

Ricky Bobby appears to be unhurt, but that Wonder Bread car is toast.
Race Announcer

If you ain't first, you're last!
Ricky Bobby

I wanna thank little baby Jesus, who's sittin' in his crib watchin the Baby Einstein developmental videos, learnin' 'bout shapes and colors.
Ricky Bobby

My teacher asked me what was the capital of North Carolina. I said Washington D.C. She said No. You’re wrong. And I said well you got a lumpy butt. Then I peed in my pants.
Texas Ranger