He’s looking so geeky he couldn’t even get into a science-fiction convention.
Ace Rimmer
Smoke me a kipper, I’ll be back for breakfast.
Ace Rimmer
You are my NEMESIS! One day, our paths will cross again, and I will destroy you!!
Dispenser Machine
I know what I did wrong last time. It’s a mistake any deranged, half-witted computer could have made.
Holly
I'm up and down more often than a pair of kangaroos in the mating season! DNA
Kryten
My goodness, I do believe I’m drunk. I suddenly feel the need to strut my funky stuff!
Kryten
I prefer something slightly more melodious. Like the long, drawn-out death rattle of a man suffering from terminal flatulence. Dimension Jump
Lister
Lister sings “Lunar City Seven”. RIMMER: Lister, have you ever been hit over the head with a welding mallot?
RIMMER
Ace and Skipper?! You sound like a kids' TV series about a boy and his bush kangaroo! Dimension Jump
Rimmer
I just wanted to say that, over the years, I have come to regard you as … people I met.
Rimmer
I just wanted to say that, over the years, I have come to regard you as ... people I met. Holoship
Rimmer
I’m organised, I’m dedicated to my career, I’ve always got a pen. Result? Total smeghead despised by everyone except the ship’s parrot. And that’s only because we haven’t got one.
Rimmer
I'm organised, I'm dedicated to my career, I've always got a pen. Result? Total smeghead despised by everyone except the ship's parrot. And that's only because we haven't got one. Thanks for the Memory
Rimmer
Kryten, kindly get to the point before I jam your nose between your cheeks and make it the filling of a buttocks sandwich.
Rimmer
Look, I think we’ve all got something to bring to this conversation, but I think that from now on what you should bring is silence.
Rimmer
Look, I think we've all got something to bring to this conversation, but I think that from now on what you should bring is silence. Gunmen of the Apocalypse
Rimmer
So Lister what are you telling us? You're a closet squirrel? Behind closed doors you parade up and down with a strap-on bushy tail, calling yourself Nutkin? DNA
Rimmer
The world loves a bastard!
Rimmer
Well, if you have any more problems with nothing or things that don’t matter, just scream out my name hysterically and I’ll come pelting down the corridor!
Rimmer
Well, if you have any more problems with nothing or things that don't matter, just scream out my name hysterically and I'll come pelting down the corridor! Future Echoes
Rimmer
We’re not getting out of here in one piece, or if we do, it’ll be one big flat piece.
Rimmer
We're not getting out of here in one piece, or if we do, it'll be one big flat piece. Gunmen of the Apocalypse
Rimmer