Michael

Abraham Lincoln once said that “If you’re a racist, I will attack you with the North,” and those are the principles that I carry with me in the workplace.

Michael

Am I going to tell them? No, I’m not going to tell them. I don’t see the point of that. As a doctor, you would not tell a patient if they had cancer.

Michael

Fredo, you're my older brother, and I love you. But don't ever take sides with anyone against the Family again. Ever.

Michael

Go for it, Maxwell. For the good of all mankind. You lucky, undeserving dog.

Michael

Have I stepped over some line in the sands of coolness with you, because excuse me if somebody doesn't know the secret handshake with you.

Michael

Here are some really exciting games you can play this Christmas. And first, from Terry, here is the A and B Game.

Michael

Here’s a viewer’s letter. It comes from Mrs. Margaret Forsdyke: “Since watching your program, I have become a new person. Yours sincerely, Mr. Arthur Vickers.”

Michael

Hi, I’m Michael Scott, Regional Manager of Dunder Mifflin Scranton. I’m also the founder of Diversity Tomorrow, because Today is almost over.

Michael

I don’t understand… you want to see other people? Only other people?

Michael

I got three hundred and sixty Christmas cards! ...And I'm not sending ANY of them until someone sends ME one.

Michael

I have a question before we start. Do you think that's safe considering you don't have a liver?

Michael

Now here's Denise to show you how to tell your friends' fortunes.

Michael

Put her in your spank bank and move on.

Michael

Would I rather be feared or loved? Easy, both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.

Michael