Principal Snyder — Characters

A wooden gavel and a pale pearl rest on a mauve cushion. — Original artwork

A lot of educators tell students, ‘Think of your principal as your pal.’ I say think of me as your judge, jury and executioner.

Principal Snyder

Three carved theatrical masks in black, charcoal and pale grey show different degrees of frowning against slate. — Original artwork

I know Principal Flutie would have said, ‘Kids need understanding. Kids are human beings.’ That’s the kind of wooly-headed liberal thinking that leads to being eaten.

Principal Snyder

Painterly school desks receding into swirling dark violet mist. — Original artwork

There are things I will not tolerate: students loitering on campus after school, horrible murders with hearts being removed...and also smoking.

Principal Snyder

Painterly magnifying glass above a sock hanging from a stool, with curling green wisps. — Original artwork

There're some things I can just smell. It's like a sixth sense.

Principal Snyder

A crumpled brown paper shopping bag sits alone on a plain floor. — Original artwork

What's in the bag?

Principal Snyder

Plain red glass bottle on low pale pedestal with several visible red capsules — Original artwork

You! All of you. Why couldn't you be dealing drugs like normal people?

Principal Snyder