Austin, I'm your father.
Dr. Evil
Austin, I'm your father.
Dr. Evil

Do you like your quasi-futuristic clothes Mr. Powers? I designed them myself.
Dr. Evil
Hot Pocket? Eggo?
Dr. Evil

Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to my underground lair. I have gathered here before me the worlds deadliest assassins.
Dr. Evil

Let me tell you a little story about a man named Sh! Sh! even before you start. That was a pre-emptive "sh!" Now, I have a whole bag of "sh!" with your name on it.
Dr. Evil

Mini Me? Mini Me? For God’s sake would somone put a fricken bell on him or something.
Dr. Evil

Mini me, stop humping the laser. Why don't you get a frickin' room already?
Dr. Evil

No, Mini-Me, we do not gnaw on our kitty, we just stroke him and love him.
Dr. Evil
No, Mini-Me, we do not knaw on our kitty, we just stroke him and love him.
Dr. Evil
Right. Okay, people, you have to tell me these things, alright? I've been frozen for 30 years, okay? Throw me a freakin bone here. I'm the boss. Need the info.
Dr. Evil
Scott, I want you to meet daddy's nemesis, Austin Powers
Dr. Evil

I love chicken, I love liver, Meow Mix Meow Mix please deliver.
Dr. Evil

There's nothing quite like a shorn scrotum. It's breathtaking, really. I suggest you try it yourself.
Dr. Evil

Well, don't look at me like I'm frickin' Frankenstein, give your father a hug.
Dr. Evil

When I get angry, Mr. Bigglesworth gets upset. And when Mr. Bigglesworth gets upset... people die!
Dr. Evil
Why must I be surrounded by frickin’ idiots?
Dr. Evil

You're not quite evil enough. You're semi-evil. You're quasi-evil. You're the margarine of evil. You're the Diet Coke of evil, just one calorie, not evil enough.
Dr. Evil